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Nothing I'm about to share with you in these following pages come from any sort of generational passing of torches. I don't have a Grandma's World Famous Bitch Cake to give you because it doesn't exist. What I can offer you instead are recipes stolen from a variety of other sites, books, and Cracker Barrels. In any of the links below, you'll find a list of ingredients followed by step-by-step instructions; no bullshit, unless you count the occasional photo. Should you have complaints following any of these recipes, please heed the following advice: MSG. Further complaints: Less MSG. But still use it.

Sweet/Spicy Chicken Drumstick Marinade, plus the Drumsticks

Rib Rub, for Rubbin' in Ribs

Cracker Barrel-like Hashbrown Casserole

Master Chef John's Masterful Mashed Potatohns

Panfried Cucumber Slices